by Peter Mahoney
(delivered in the British Museum, London at the Global Salon Business Awards in June 2004)

St. Louis, Missouri: Wed May 19, 11:30 AM

It might be the emotional cry for help I received at 2:00 am this morning from a former staff member that’s to blame for these comments, but I believe I have something to say. Or rather, I have something to say that I believe in. There’s a cruel wind blowing through our industry. We all feel it, and if we don't, perhaps we've forgotten how to feel. But here is the truth: many of us are less like ourselves today than we were when we started our business.

I care very much about the fact that I have learned to care less. The business of dressing hair has never been bigger, or tougher, or more talked about, and we gathered here today are at the forefront of that business. I can’t help but wonder, before we leave here on Tuesday, as we laugh and talk and celebrate our success, our glasses of champagne in hand, will we say to each other what we really think?

This goes beyond the easy arguments of diversion; chain salons vs. sole proprietors; independent contractors vs. commissioned employees; and single line vs. multi line distributors.  It is beyond the huge salaries our top stylists now demand and beyond the mergers and acquisitions. It is more subtle than a staff walkout and more about loyalty than a stylist moving his or her business down the street. I'm talking about something the magazines don’t write about. I'm talking about something we don't talk about.

We are losing the battle with all that is personal and real about our business. We are lost in the illusion of success, pushing numbers around, doing our best to survive, but is there any real satisfaction in success without pride? When we learn not to care enough about the very guy or gal we promised the world to, just to get him or her to come to work for us? I believe that we are now at a point of transformation in our industry, but this is not something to fear; it is something to celebrate. I come to you this morning in this historic building, not only with a challenge; I come to you with answers too.

Right now we are at breaking point with our business. Most of us are not so huge that we must lose that personal touch, and not so small that we have not experienced huge success. We are at a point of neutrality. We are all, right now, neutral. Neutral, as in not black or white, not good or bad. Just even. Neutral.

Even in my own life in 1992 at the ripe old age of 32, I felt I had never done that "one thing", that noble thing that defines a life.  I was used to flying below the radar, enjoying my life and friends, but I had not been truly tested. I had not gone to Tibet to explore my life, as my sister had. I had not been in a major car accident or near death experience; I had not felt the pain of losing a love one, or the acceleration of running a marathon. I was neutral. I had broken even with my life. I had a nice home, a nice car, four beautiful children and a successful salon. But I had not taken that step, or risk, that made the air I breathed for 32 years worthwhile. I once had a brown couch. I got rid of it because it was neutral. At 32 my life had become that brown couch. I had said "later" to almost anything that required true sacrifice. Later I will lose weight. Later I will quite smoking. Later I will jump out of an airplane. Later I will visit the stylists whose careers are over, but of course I promised to stay in touch with. Later, later, later, later. It is too easy to say "later" because we all believe our work to be too important to stop, minute to minute, for something that might interfere with the restless and relentless pursuit of forward motion, of greater success.

Make no mistake; I am a huge fan of success, but today, I propose a different definition of success. How can we do something surprising and memorable with our careers? How can we turn our influence, in small but important ways, into a better representation of ourselves? How do we wish to define our lives? How do we want to be remembered? Or do we want to be just another piece in the puzzle that has become the globalization of our industry.

2:15 PM: En Route to New York City

Salons may never be the pure and simple thing that older clients pine for. That barber shop or beauty salon where our parents went and everyone knew each other is, of course, a fantasy that lives in the mind. The salon industry is a huge operation. Everyone knows that the salon is a machine. The money is now in danger of overshadowing the meaning. We know it, our staff knows it and our customers know it.

Right now we're at the top of our game. Traditionally people do one thing at this point in their success. They try like hell to maintain what they did to get there. Their personal and intense road to success, their original inspiration (which is at the heart of every success) is now lost in the pursuit to keep the money machine smoothly rolling forward, delivering crisp green sheets of greater and greater amounts of fortune, but we forget the original glimmer of passion that got us there.

And historically, no one successful ever pauses to think that they might tumble like everyone before them who forgot. The whole success cycle dooms the very thing that causes the success in the first place - it puts shutters on the windows of reality. It makes us all forget that monetary success comes from something very pure and very humble. It comes from a desire to do well, to make life better, and not just to do well with financial regularity.

Richmond, Virginia: Thurs May 18 11:30 PM

I have just brewed a pot of coffee. Maybe I'm crazy, maybe it's just tonight, but I really do think I'm onto something here. This is from my heart. This is a love letter to a business I truly love.

As leaders in our industry I propose we embrace a new definition of success, one that incorporates our customers our staff and our communities. We must crack open the tightly clenched fist of commerce as Paula and the sponsors of this event have so gracefully demonstrated, and give a little back for the greater good. Eventually revenues will be the same, and that goodness will be infectious. We will have taken our number oneness and turned it into something greater. Winston Churchill said “we make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give”

As we plan our future and the future of our business let us not forget that people always respond best to personal attention; it is the simplest and easiest truth to forget. Whether we realize it or not our influence, our leadership has a profound effect on others. We become the subject of our staff’s dinner conversations. In a cynical world, we possess the ability to make people happy. To lift them up, to give them a vision and hope for a better tomorrow, to let them know that one client, one person, can make a difference. This is our destiny as it has been the destiny of all great leaders. Let us be honest with ourselves. Let us be honest with them. The phone calls will still come in at 2 AM, but on the other end of that phone at 2 AM will be someone deserving of your time, and you will be honored to share their time.

And if I am wrong, then grab me by the collar and tell me why you disagree. And I will happily talk with you because we are talking about something that matters. Management is about doing things right; leadership is about doing the right things. We are talking about the development of character and passion in others, not the illusion of our own success. How many people have said in our presence, "I thought I would feel better when I was rich, but I don't."

I hope that I have not overstepped my boundaries by writing this to you. This is an attempt to reach out, and say loudly the things that have been festering within. And once you begin to speak these things, it's hard to stop.

Life, I believe, is not a country club where we forget the difficulties and anxieties. Life is the duty of confronting all which lies within us. You can e-mail the President, you can get sushi in a supermarket in the middle of the desert, you don't even have to read a book anymore, and you can buy a tape where it is read out-loud. But where is the simple truth about how to live a quality life?

Fri May 21, 11:10 PM: Somewhere over Manhattan

I am too excited to sleep now. I want these words to last the light of day!

 I am wondering what that exact moment is when we truly, truly love what we do. Is it during the day, or at the end of the day, or is it years later looking back on all we accomplished? I think perhaps truly loving something is the ability to love it at that moment. Being able to enjoy it as it is happening and knowing in that moment, like this moment, that the journey is everything!

I have now written far too much on the subject of our future, and the future of our business. But the beauty of this proposal, I think, is that it is only a slight adjustment; an adjustment in our minds. An adjustment in attitude to the point where we can discuss the things that really matter to us, and our salons.

I believe in these words, and while they may not yet be true for you, they are true for me. A life is not worth living if you are sleepwalking through it, because that is what feels like death. Take a step away from others living life around you, keeping their fists tightly wound around whatever dollars they can muster, caring little more than nothing about those around them. We cannot sleepwalk, these are our lives; it is time to start living them. It is time to not second guess, to move forward, to make mistakes if we have to, but to do it with a greater good in mind.

Let us start a revolution. Let us start a revolution that is not just about sales and profits but rather about people and relationships. In the words of Martin Luther King, "A life is not worth living until you have something to die for."

Halifax, Nova Scotia: Sun May 23 11:35 AM

Moments ago I just completed my third marathon, (26.2 mi) with my wife Tracy and my sisters Mary and Anne our children Michael Christopher, Jeffrey and Katie at the finish line cheering us home. They are something I am prepared to die for and I’m prepared to live for our cause. The cause is caring about each other. The secret to leadership, the future of our industry, and the quality of our life is our personal relationships.